Book Club, "Born on a Blue Day"

Last Sunday the BHC Book Club met to discuss Daniel Tammett's Born on a Blue Day. It was an interesting tale of a young man with Asperger's Syndrome, a mild form of autism, and his journey. He was fascinating in that he is also a savant who can do incredibly complex math problems in his head, and he also has synethesia, an overlapping of the senses. He sees numbers in colors and shapes, and Wednesdays, the day he was born, are "blue" in his mind.

It was a triumph for him that he was able to travel to other countries all by himself (his amazing facility with language contributed to that) and also that he was able to find himself a lifelong partner.

We discussed autism and the forms it takes. Sheila used her nephew as an example but others among us have known autistic children and young adults so we were able to contribute to the discussion as well. We also talked about the stigma against autism, mental illness, etc. and whether we would be willing to hire a young man like Daniel. I said, because he does not understand human emotions all that well, I would not assign him to deal with people but I would be happy to hire him to a position where his facility with numbers would be valuable.

As always it was an excellent discussion. Kudos to Sheila!

Digital Reflection with Lois Kellerman

Last Saturday night ten of us gathered at Michael and Antoinette's for a potluck dinner and a Reflection by Skype, with Ethical Culture Leader Lois Kellerman. Lois was Leader of the Queens Society for Ethical Culture and then the Brooklyn Society for Ethical Culture, departing from that position in 1998 to move to California with her husband.

We had some technical glitches as this was our first time using Skype, but while we were able to see Lois "live" for a few minutes, she was able to see us throughout the Reflection. Our topic was "Preserving Relationships in Difficult Times."

Lois had an excellent, illustrated brochure with many suggestions for doing this, but what touched me the most was her description of some of the hardships she has faced and managed to come through, as well as other people's stories. One person described the death of a difficult and demanding relative who became a courageous and graceful voyager into the unknown territory at the end of life.

Others described different situations that caused great stress in their families and relationships, but we were able to hold them together. While Lois's suggestions were not necessarily news to us, it is valuable to re-emphasize them when faced with problems that seem insurmountable. These are the times we need our loved ones and support systems the most, and it's vitally important to hold onto them rather than isolate ourselves and push others away.

Many thanks to Lois for speaking to us, to Michael for handling the technical side on our end, and to Michael and Antoinette both for once again hosting a BHC program this month. Our next event is tonight, a Meditation with Remi, at the home of Bruce, Celeste and Jason.